It's Not Paranoia If They're Really Out To Get You
What seems like three months is in actuality only three weeks, boy how time flies. I’m tired, Momma Bear is tired; we are all tired, well, except LeeLoo Bear. She’s full of energy and ATTITUDE. At first, when we brought LeeLoo Bear home, she was shy and sleepy; she ate, crapped, and slept in that order. Now, well it’s different, she sleeps less and attacks more. Her shyness went out the window and now she’s a bold spawn from Hell that you just can’t retaliate against because she’s so damned cute and cuddly . Since no one is kicking her ass and putting her in her place, she seems to think that she is bigger and stronger then she is, and with aggressive action she unleashes pain and punishment on everybody and everything in the house.
Do you know what it feels like to have a 17 pound animal hanging from your leg as you drag it from room to room? Well we do, everything is a target for our pretty little terror with razor sharp teeth! She blindsides you, she comes your way and looks up at you with that cute little black and white face, you think she wants to cuddle or get pets, only to find out she wants nothing more than to bite down on any part of your body she can reach and shake.
At first LeeLoo Bear attacked your fingers or maybe pulled at your pant leg, but now as she grows older and bigger she attacks everything that’s in reach. Pick her up to cuddle her and at first it starts out sweet, she licks your face and puppy groans, but that all falls apart as she sinks her fangs into your chin or nose! With wild animal-like sounds coming from her she leaves no doubt that she means to have you submit to her by any means necessary…
Poor Sugar Bear, she’s gained most of LeeLoo Bear’s attention and submits daily to the pain god while she tries to sleep or relax with a good bone. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not all LeeLoo Bear’s fault, she can’t help but get pumped up and really how many two month olds have control of themselves. Sugar Bear, having another dog to play with can’t help herself either; she draws LeeLoo Bear in to play by any means she can find. Yet what starts out as light play soon turns into a W.W.E.. cage match with no holds barred. Basically LeeLoo bear is unstoppable, no matter what move Sugar Bear pulls, whether it’s a toss over the head, choke hold, or submission hold, no matter what she tries, as soon as LeeLoo regains her bearings she’s right back in the mix, chomping down on one soft spot or another on Sugar Bear’s body.
Though Sugar Bear gets most of LeeLoo’s malicious attention now, no one is safe from those chompers. LeeLoo Bear will walk through the house with confidence and when she spots another animal, like one of the cats, her instinct is to lunge forward and bite down and of course she acts on it. The cats don’t take her shit though, they fight back, however LeeLoo Bear takes it as a challenge and doubles her effort to bite down on a body part. I don’t take pity on the cats though; they mess with LeeLoo bear, flaunting themselves in front of her as we attempt to hold LeeLoo Bear back. So they get what they deserve! The poor ferret though, that’s another story; she has no chance against the faster, bigger LeeLoo Bear and once she’s been spotted we have to move fast or end up prying her out of LeeLoo’s mouth.
There are breaks though, namely when she sleeps. Although even then you have to watch out or fall prey to the fangs. Many times when LeeLoo Bear sleeps, we take advantage and try to get a cat nap out of it too, but that too sometimes ends in pain. I have a pretty big nose and it ends up being LeeLoo’s target more often than not. You drift off after a sleepless night, cuddling with LeeLoo for a peaceful nap and it ends in Hell as you try to pry LeeLoo off of your face as she playfully paws and chomps down on your face.
I’ve gotten smarter though, it’s a learning curve because LeeLoo has no rhyme or reason to her attacks. All of her assaults are spontaneous and without cause. Now I’ve learned when I sleep to cover my face and feet and I damned sure make sure my “man junk” is covered too. When I walk around with LeeLoo, I always let her take the lead, that way she’s not sinking her teeth into my calf with her damned sneak attacks. But what has really saved me is that Sugar Bear has become LeeLoo’s new chew toy and she’s lost some interest in chewing us humans. Don’t get me wrong, I feel bad for Sugar, especially when she’s trying to sleep and I will be forever in her debt for taking some of the attention away from us but it sure is nice that I don’t have to watch my back as much. I was starting to get paranoid!
